I painted this entire series at once. I’ve never done that before. It’s always been one at a time. This project felt special. I had taken some time to marinate and breathe after “Honey From the Wound”, aka “Boy Problems”, and this is what came through. These paintings are all about prayer, inhabiting the self, and meditation.
Meditation practices were a big part of healing the trauma from a psychologically abusive relationship. I suffered the worst and longest bout of anxiety and depression I had ever imagined. It almost broke me, but learning to deepen my presence within, and surrender to the unknown, helped heal my psyche and heart.
When a person is subject to narcissistic abuse, their entire reality and experience of the world, and of themselves, becomes fractured. It is a wild ride, one that I would not wish upon anyone, but am currently taking steps to educate others on how to heal from that kind of trauma. Doing such work inspired this series of pieces.
The above painting is called I Think I Need Some Space, and features my dear friend and fellow artist, Arulu Gallagher, surrounded in space. She also brought her newest ceramic sculptures to the show, of selkies and heron women. They had stars painted into them, and she shared stories of the selkie and the heron wife, who both found liberation from oppressive domestic conditions .
These two pieces I kept more stark. I love the way the umber of an underpainting luminesces with the white of the canvas just beneath it. The deadline of the show helped me not to go crazy on these and allow the raw simplicity to remain visible. Both of these are 4 feet tall.
Left: Cradle of Surrender
Right: The Eye of I
This was the first piece in the series, named Intention. It is about prayer, and how a simple intention can cause a series of ripples through our lives and the world.
This painting is called “center of gravity”. It is oil on wood panel, and depicts the experience of dropping into ones own center during meditation. From this space, one is able to attract what is most in alignment to their well being, and also sends frequencies of their truest essence into the universe.
This is an oil painting of my dear friend Chrysta Bell. It’s not quite finished, but it was well enough along to hang in the show. It conveys the remembrance of home, the soul’s birthplace, beyond space and time.
“Spiraling” was a self portrait experiment I started a few years ago. I didnt quite like what was happening with it, so I let it sit for a while. Then I decided to work a couple of galaxies in there to portray a self reflective state, the inner and outer cosmic mirror, as within so without, as she is playing with a spiraling ringlet of hair.
The sculptural work of Arulu Gallagher, was a perfect fit to this show’s theme. She had already created these works for another exhibition, and had painted space scapes into the characters, who each symbolize a plight for personal freedom.
This show as initially inspired by another dear friend, Charles Wu. He encouraged an exhibit and party in my studio, and I was wanting to share this new series, so we went for it. He shared his collage art, weaving social, spiritual, and sensual motifs with vintage playboy imagery. His work was provocative and edgy, and provided a good amount of social commentary to ponder.
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